{ thoughts on paper }

"Audry" close up

How do you sum up's one experiances?

I've read the magic of memoirs firsthand. How seemingly insignificant moments in day-to-day life suddenly gain poetic meaning through the magic of perspective, and, maybe, that need to feel as though everything's important. Your life is important. Perhaps that's why memoirs and biographies fascinate us so much -- living vicariously through someone else, going on their adventures as though you were right there next to them.

My original intent for NaNoWriMo was to write memoirs, or maybe creative & artistically-themed essays (God knows I write them on this blog every week!). But I found it hard. How do you pull the right details? Shape it into something interesting and reader-worthy? Plus, for all the writing I seem to do here and there, it's been a long while since I seriously sat down and wrote. So, yeah, I'm behind on NaNo. Seriously. Because it took DAYS for my brain to stop thinking things over, editing things, trying to make it all better instead of just getting words down on the page.

And here's an oddly enough: remember how I was so intent on working in my journal, I didn't do many paintings? That all my work was journal work, and little moved outside of that?

All I've been doing is paintings! Big ones, little ones, just paintings. I haven't had words. My journal has so many backgrounds done, ready for the words...it sits next to my desk just begging to be worked in. All my thoughts are going towards my work for NaNo, to the journal I've been creating for Christmas-time (there are so many backgrounds and fun pages already, and the binding machine's here and ready to put it all together!). I feel like there isn't much left over. Writing and writing has me out of the studio and in the world -- coffee shops, friends' houses, movie theaters. I've gone from being an artist living in a studio to a girl out in the world, falling back on her words.

Is this a move backwards? Reverting to my pre-artistic self? Is that possible? Or will I approach it all differently, since I'm a different person after all?

Give way to the flow. I have to remind myself to not force things, not push. Go with it. See where it takes you. The scenery's beautiful, so enjoy the ride.